if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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