We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
