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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I need new friends

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.

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• (518): View more from New York

  for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.

  (1-401): View more from Rhode Island

  And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?

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• (361): View more from Texas

  WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?

  (903): View more from Texas

  I would peed on everything

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms

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• (985): View more from Louisiana

  Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.

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• (731): View more from Tennessee

  I'm really busy with my period

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