were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
