Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
