i just google imaged poop.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
