carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
