I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
