I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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