The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
