Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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