I will die if light touches me.
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
