idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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