Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
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