i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
