I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
