My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
