Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
