I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
