im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
