This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
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