I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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