Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
