I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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