seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
