butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
