Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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