what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
