how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
