And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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