Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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