you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
