Sry I called you an 8
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Randomize
