This girl is more easily done than said...
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Randomize
