fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
