Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize