Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
