There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Is Oprah even human
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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