you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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