No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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