he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
