So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
