So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
