Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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