i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
