just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
two words: eviction party
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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