it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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