I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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