ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
