If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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