Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
