marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
