the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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